Saturday, February 24, 2018


I had this erotic dream last night about this escort I know of. It’s been on my mind throughout the day. I went to boot camp for the first time in months. I didn’t try my hardest, but burned over 700 calories. I spent hours at the library reading. My psychologist suggested trying to write at the library like I used to. I haven’t written since November 26, but I’m thinking I might open the manuscript tomorrow and give it a try. I feel like I’m putting my life back together, but it’s going to mean not seeing many people.

Friday, February 23, 2018


So far it’s been easy for me to maintain a vegan alkaline diet. The only processed food I allowed myself was salad dressing. That was my deal. I’ll eat tons of vegetables raw as long as I could have as much salad dressing as I wanted. Well today I ate a large plate of vegetables and went through half a bottle of vegan ranch dressing. I’m going to try to keep this dietary change going before I attempt to cut back on the dressing. I’m also signed up to go back to boot camp this weekend. I have to go.

Thursday, February 22, 2018


My problem. I work over forty hours a week. I want to go to boot camp four times a week. I also want to go to the gym to spend more time lifting and listening to audio books while on the treadmill. But I also want to read at least 48 books this year. I also need to finish writing Scribbling The Eternal. I see my psychologist every week and my psychiatrist every month. Often I’m so exhausted I want to go to sleep by 4 p.m. There just isn’t enough time. And every day I feel myself growing older.

Wednesday, February 21, 2018


I wish I had more people I could travel with who wanted to go to the places I want to go. Malta, Thailand, Costa Rica, Argentina, Vietnam, Holland, Russia…. But it’s so hard to coordinate schedules. It’s also an expense many friends can’t afford. And if you offer to pay for a single friend they think you expect sex. Well hoping for sex and expecting sex are two different things. Who doesn’t hope for sex? It’s really no big deal. Most of my friends who can afford it more easily are also married, so then there’s the third wheel thing.

Tuesday, February 20, 2018


I had a lot on my mind regarding personal finances. There’s so much I want to do, travel being at the top of the list. But the more spreadsheets I make, the more travel keeps getting delayed. I want to invest more. I want to put more into my 403B. I want to pay off debts. I want to pay for the Orly photo shoot. I want to finally get my back piece tattoo. But now I’m getting emails from They sent me an email for a trip to Malta for only $600. Malta? My first choice retirement destination!