Saturday, May 31, 2014

Coffin


Long Beach Comic Expo. Sales were abysmal. My booth is in a bad location and patrons were disappointed I write illustrated books rather than comics or graphic novels. Try again tomorrow. Ashley, your parents came to my booth. I held your mother as she wept. I could see it in her face. She too knew you should have been there. She said you came to her in her dream last night and told her to give me this little coffin that she didn't know you had. I will cherish it always. I'm glad they know how much I love you.

Erik Olson

Friday, May 30, 2014

Operator


I left work early today in order to go to Long Beach to set up my book booth for Long Beach Comic Expo this weekend. People there were very nice to me. My booth is tiny, I should have paid for a larger one, but I made this one work. Next time I'll pay for something bigger. I phoned Ashley's parents from the convention center to ask them if I should buy them discount tickets. The voicemail answered with an operator who said it was Ashley's number. That was shocking. Tonight, I'm a sad ponies and I can't say why.

Dust Portrait by Gabriel de la Chapelle

Thursday, May 29, 2014

Forehead


I just turned in the second installment of pages of the screenplay I'm being paid to write. That was a relief. I knew I'd meet my deadline, but I feel like I can breathe again, for a little while at least. I'm really anxious to go back to writing The Dead Girl I Like Heart and Stuff and The Scribbled Victims. This afternoon a melancholy came over me. I rested my forehead on Ashley's forehead in the framed photo I have of her on my desk. Maybe that's crazy, but there was something soothing in it. I talked to her.

Manuel Estheim

Wednesday, May 28, 2014

Awkward


I had three meetings today at work. In the second meeting, my work crush attended. That was unexpected. It felt awkward, but when I came back into the meeting room we both waved and said hello. That helped with the awkward feelings but it also made me have a glimmer of hope that she never got my message and that all these awkward feelings are just in my head. But in reality, I think that's highly unlikely. I have been talking to another girl. I find her really interesting, but she's not looking to date. I'm writing prolifically at least. 

Catrin Welz-Stein

Tuesday, May 27, 2014

Extension


I worked a long day. I'm tired. I haven't written yet and I don't feel like it. Hopefully, I'll feel like it when I get home. I wish I could get a tattoo right now. The excitement would wake me up. I got a one-day extension on my screenplay so that's probably why I'm being lazy. I began putting together the production costs of putting out a graphic novel of The Scribbled Victims. It will be expensive. I don't know if I would ever come close to recovering my expenses, but there is a lot of satisfaction in just publishing.

Henrik Isaksson Garnell


Monday, May 26, 2014

Graphic


I wrote a lot today. I'm still about ten pages short, but I feel confident I'll finish by Wednesday. At Bats Day, I told Cynthia about the plot of my work in progress, The Scribbled Victims, and she suggested that I make it into a graphic novel. I'm kicking around the idea of  still writing it as a novel and then doing a graphic novel version too. I don't know how to write a graphic novel, but I began reading one Cynthia suggested so hopefully I'll learn. I also am now in contact with an artist I might work with.

Conrad Jon Godly

Sunday, May 25, 2014

Emptiness


How do I scream loudly enough for you to hear me? I'm sad today, Ashley. I'm sitting here writing in circles looking at you. You're on my mind a lot with Long Beach Comic Expo coming up. This is the event you should be at with me. Your parents will be there. I imagine they too will see the emptiness in my booth. I wish you were here. We could still be working. We could be working on something new. I feel like you're looking back at me, but in reality I know you were staring into a camera lens.

Lou Ros

Saturday, May 24, 2014

Fifteen


I needed to write thirty pages during this three-day weekend. It's almost nine p.m. and I still haven't written today. I guess I'll be writing fifteen pages over the next two days instead of ten pages over three. I went on a hike with Farishta this morning. It was fun and felt good. As always she made me laugh. We went to breakfast afterward. When I got home, I took a nap and when I woke I had a voicemail from my sister. I took her to the emergency room and read a book in the waiting room for hours.

Romain Larbre

Friday, May 23, 2014

Laughter



I’m actually smiling right now. I’ve laughed a lot today. That always gets me a lot of attention in the office, I guess because I’m not the biggest laughter. I picked up Ham on Rye again and can’t stop laughing. I’m also happy that I work for someone intelligent. I’m glad for the weekend too. It’s going to be good. I have a lot to write but I’m also going on a hike and to breakfast with Farishta tomorrow morning. I’m always happier when she is around. I’ve added a lot of new friends on Facebook since Bats Day weekend. 

Joanne Nam



Thursday, May 22, 2014

Go



My work crush still hadn’t replied to my email inviting her to lunch and I had to phone her today to discuss some accounting issues. She didn’t mention my email at all. Based on that I’m concluding she’s not interested so I’m letting it go. I’m about to leave work. I already wrote this morning, so I should force myself to go to the gym. I got so much done today. I enjoy days like these. I might go to Portland for work later this year. I’ve never been so it will be fun despite days and days of meetings. 

Sculpture made of wax, marble powder, and fabric by Virgile Ittah

Wednesday, May 21, 2014

Attack



I had an anxiety attack today during a meeting. I have general anxiety but it’s been over a year since I actually had an attack. I had to text my office to have someone go across campus to bring me meds to my meeting. I see my shrink in 45 minutes. I intended to come back to work afterwards to write for the day, but I don’t think it’s a good idea. I had forgotten how exhausting anxiety attacks can be. I’ll probably just go home and lie down and maybe read a book. I need a relaxing vacation soon.

Mara Light

Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Arrangement



Normally I write my blogs right before I go to sleep but for the next couple of weeks at least I will be writing them during the day. I’m doing this so I can leave my laptop at work and spend my afternoons exercising and relaxing instead of continually working. I’m not sure how I will fit my writing schedule into this arrangement, maybe I’ll go back to handwriting on paper. I’m trying to get excited about Long Beach Comic Expo later this month, but honestly I feel intimidated because it’s bigger than Bats Day and not a goth event.

Aitor Renteria